Archive for July 21st, 2017

With one letter, Hadi Awang imagines himself sitting underneath that dome, above.


Dear Ustaz Hadi Awang,

Thank you for your letter and your offer.

Addressing us as non-Muslims, one must assume you are talking to us. But, you should never, never, never again address us as non-Muslims like you are fond of saying ‘non-Malay’ and ‘non-bumi’. If you are talking to Christians, you know you don’t stand a chance with your preaching. If you have a mind to speak to ‘infidels’ or ‘kafirs’ (and Christians in your Islamic lexicon is not ‘infidel’?) say so because those labels are the badges you pin on us.

Some of us might be Buddhists, others Hindus — who you treat not respectfully as humans but as targets for conversion, like the Christians do. Any which way you look at it, we are a people ultimately free from the shackles of your desert import and your kind of a God. Call us a Free People. You see, Hadi, in your manner of speech, even in your opening lines, you start disrespectful. Any wonder why we don’t give a fuck for your Islam? Allah or God or whatever you call ‘It’ — this Imagination — has been the curse of humankind.

Then there is the matter of language. Since you write and talk to infidels, here is what we suggest you do next time: Write in hanzi. Or get a translation and email it. Malaiyoo also boleh. Otherwise, I don’t see how we are going to talk fruitfully and productively. What’s this gobbledygook:

إِنَّمَا ٱلۡمُؤۡمِنُونَ إِخۡوَةٞ فَأَصۡلِحُواْ بَيۡنَ أَخَوَيۡكُمۡۚ وَٱتَّقُواْ ٱللَّهَ لَعَلَّكُمۡ تُرۡحَمُونَ ١٠ يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ لَا يَسۡخَرۡ قَوۡمٞ مِّن قَوۡمٍ عَسَىٰٓ أَن يَكُونُواْ خَيۡرٗا مِّنۡهُمۡ وَلَا نِسَآءٞ مِّن نِّسَآءٍ عَسَىٰٓ أَن يَكُنَّ خَيۡرٗا مِّنۡهُنَّۖ وَلَا تَلۡمِزُوٓاْ أَنفُسَكُمۡ وَلَا تَنَابَزُواْ بِٱلۡأَلۡقَٰبِۖ بِئۡسَ ٱلِٱسۡمُ ٱلۡفُسُوقُ بَعۡدَ ٱلۡإِيمَٰنِۚ وَمَن لَّمۡ يَتُبۡ فَأُوْلَٰٓئِكَ هُمُ ٱلظَّٰلِمُونَ ١١ يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ ٱجۡتَنِبُواْ كَثِيرٗا مِّنَ ٱلظَّنِّ إِنَّ بَعۡضَ ٱلظَّنِّ إِثۡمٞۖ وَ لَا تَجَسَّسُواْ وَلَا يَغۡتَب بَّعۡضُكُم بَعۡضًاۚ أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمۡ أَن يَأۡكُلَ لَحۡمَ أَخِيهِ مَيۡتٗا فَكَرِهۡتُمُوهُۚ وَٱتَّقُواْ ٱللَّهَۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ تَوَّابٞ رَّحِيمٞ ١٢ الحجرات .

ٱتَّبِعُواْ مَن لَّا يَسَۡٔألُكُمۡ أَجۡرٗا وَهُم مُّهۡتَدُونَ ٢١ يس

You fill half of your letter with that worm-stuff and the other half explaining them, what then does it say of you, your intellect and your offer? Even my computer has trouble computing. I read that the only official Islam is the one written in Mecca; even translations won’t do, so have you written permission from those camel herdsmen?

Now to your talking points, which boil down to two because your letter is so filled with trash.

I borrow the first from Malaysiakini, in which you compare your kind of Islam with Karl Marx and Adam Smith. I assume you aren’t talking about Marxism or laissez faire market economics, but Marx as communism and Smith as capitalism. Those two broad categories, the latter as ideology, the former as disciplines of study, are different; you know that, of course, smart towel head like you.

Let me, therefore, grant you the validity of your comparison, but have you read the Das Kapital? How about The Wealth of Nations? Yes or no?

O! I see, you have read excerpts. Wonderful. Tell us then what do you understand by these books? (This is becoming tiresome, talking to you.)

Point Two, you say:

“Why can’t they give the Islamic approach to politics, economy and society, without any compulsion to leave their religions, a try?”

A ‘try’? Why don’t you instead give it a try, converting to Hinduism? It makes more sense, and you have nothing to lose, not even your head should you later change your mind, and Allah — and this is the god-damned divine truth — is worth losing. Compulsion? Leave my religion? But, Hadi, we have no ‘religion’ to leave, and we have no God to forsake. As for compulsion, you know what happens once we get into Islam; into it Yes, Out is only possible after detaching head from neck. Yet you have the nerve to lecture us on ‘compulsion’.

Let’s us grant your generosity — offering ‘no compulsion’ — but to accept the Islamic way is actually submerging our lives into your religion, that is, living the Islamic way of life. Are you a con artist, Hadi? Like Najib Razak?

You mentioned specifically three fields of endeavor in living but we’ll just forget ‘society’ because you don’t what you’re saying. Let’s talk politics and economics.

Pray tell, what is Islamic politics? Please explain. After that, also explain what’s Islamic economics? Even to grant you that these are disciplines in the Quran what do you understand by their modern-day terms, politics and economics?

We don’t expect you to answer though, Hadi, which are necessary to decide whether or not to accept your offer.

In truth of matter, then, we are wasting time even reading your letter and answering it. All you want is a Chinaman’s vote and you can’t even be straight and come out to say so. Instead, you go on and on and on about the Quran this and Quran that, then went on about no compulsion and yet want us to live the Islamic life you live.

Was all that necessary? Let’s not even talk about rationality, but do you think that’s argument? Meaning, is all that verbiage, your verbiage, grounds for accepting your offer? Next time, when the elections come and if you’re going to go down this road of asking for a vote, make it stick even if you can’t say why. If not, at least say, what’s in it for us?

Now to the penultimate question: Why would you want our votes? So you can create a model Islamic universe in this shitty country call Malaysia? But you don’t need us, according to Helen Aku Cina Ang: You have all the Malaiyoos and all the kampungs under your thumb. Are you going to contest in Seputeh? Cheras? These are godless, filthy, prostitute-ridden infidel areas, according to Petra Kamarudin, the Moron of Manchester.

You know, Hadi, you aren’t a very good con artist. You might try learning from Najib Razak though. You know Najib? The man with a mighty fork tongue and a swift deft of hand.

Come elections, you want our votes, let us see you suck Najib’s dick. Meantime, Salam and fuck off,

Yours truly,






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